Rule # 9 – Know What You Want

The ninth rule of being a man is:

Know what you want

In order for you to be true to yourself and to have a plan for your life, you have to know yourself and know what you want.

Being honest with yourself is an important part of being a man. And it’s especially true here.

In order to know what you want, you have to know yourself and be really honest with yourself.

It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks, what they want, or what they should think you want.

What you want is only up to you. Only you can know what you truly want.

In order to have clarity of purpose, clarity on your goals, and be able to have a plan that fits your life, you have to be really clear on what your goals are. And you can’t compromise on them.

It’s OK to make compromises in life. Compromises are an essential means of making life work with others.

But it’s not OK to compromise your wants. Maybe you won’t get everything you want. But you’re don’t have integrity and you aren’t true to who you are if you aren’t honest with yourself about what you want.

Whatever you want, it’s OK. It doesn’t matter what your wants are as much as it matters that you’re honest about yourself about your wants.

What if you want fame, fortune, peace, quiet, prestige, fun, love, sex, expensive possessions, adventure, or a legacy?

Every one of those things is OK to want.

What if you want darker things like revenge? Or drugs or alcohol when you’re addicted to those things?

I’m going to tell you that it’s also OK to want revenge or drugs or alcohol.

But I’m going to warn you that’s it’s not OK to pursue revenge. And it’s not OK to pursue drugs or alcohol when it’s damaging to you, your life, or those around you.

That might seem hypocritical of me, but here’s the thing – What you WANT isn’t the same as what you DO.

Just because you want something doesn’t mean you will get it. In fact, it doesn’t even always mean that you will go after it.

If you recognize that your wants are not positive, do not support your values and beliefs, are harmful to yourself or others, etc. then you aren’t going to want to pursue them.

However, it’s still important to be honest about wanting them.

Knowing yourself, knowing what you truly want, and being very clear about it with yourself is a fundamental key to being able to align yourself, understand your motives, and live a life of integrity.

In short, knowing yourself and your wants is fundamental to living life as a man.

– Weston Henry


Do you know what you really want in life?

Are you honest with others about what you want? Or do you compromise or hide your wants in fear of what others will think of you?